new Husband wife jokes

Bihar ki gali mai pan ki dukan,
Devdas ne dekhi Paro Ki muskan,
Devdas ne khilaya paro ko pan,
Kha k pan Paro boli “Shukriya Bhai Jan.


Mere Dil, Jiger, Kidney, Liver ho tm, waqt-bewaqt aye vo fever ho tm, Dub kr jisme mr jau vo Rivr ho tm, phir bhi Mere jevn mai forever ho tm…


Majnu ko laila ka sms nhi aiya..
Majnu ne 3 Din se khana nhi khaya..
Majnu mrne wala tha laila ke pyar mai..
Aur laila bethi thi sms free hone ke intezar mai………


Maine tere pyar mai kya nhi kiya O chhaliye,
Maine tere pyar mein kya nhi kiya O chhaliye,
Iodex maliye kaam pe chaliye.


2 Type Ki Girls K Piche Nhi Bhago

1-Jiske Piche Me Hu

Q Kyo?
Wo Tujko Kbhi Nhi Milegi.

2-Jiske Piche Me Nai Hu

Q Kyo?
Jo Mujse Nhi Pati Wo Tumse Kya Ptegi.


7-chiz jb khatm ho jati hai to bahut taklif hoti hai
1-Pyar
2-Rishta
3-School Life
4-Dosti
5-Paise
6-Sms Pakage

OR

7. Toilet Mai Pani………………


China cricket kyu nhi khelta??
.
Kyu k
Technical problem hai
.
Sab k face 1 jaise hote hai
jo out ho jaye
woh muh dho k phir se a sakta hai.


Phulo ko phul pasnd hai
Dilo ko Dil pasnd hai
Shayr ko Shayri pasnd hai
kisi ki pasnd se hme kya
hme to AAP KI GIRL FRIEND PASAND hai mere dost


Agr Mobile India Mai Bana Hota To Us Mai Ye Templates Hote: 1.Kutey Call Kr
2.Cigrete Lete Hue Aiyo
3.Yar Kisi Lakdi Ka No. Dede
4.Recharge Karade Kamine
5.Kuttey ! Kahan Mra Pada Hai
6.Gate P Aja Jaldi
7.Yar Meri Bandi Naraz Ho Gai Hai…


GF-Me kisi aur se shadi kr rhi hu
Bf-Na tere ane ki khushi
Na tere jane ka gum
Ja
Dusri pata lenge hum
Kyoki jisme he dum wo h BAJIRAO SINGHAM………


A boy was trying 2 propose a girl
finally he proposed in unique way;
“kya tum apni chita ko aag lagane ka adhikar
Mere Bete ko Dogi.??”

 

pati patni jokes

:: Husband and Wife Jokes :

pati- hipnotis kya hota hai?
patni-kisiko apne control mai kr k apne marji ka kaam krwana.
pati-chal jhuti!!!! use to shaadi kehte hai..

:: Latest Husband and Wife Jokes ::

chor-tmhare pass jo kuch bhi hai fata fat de do.

admi-bhai,aisa maat karo,agar mai khali hath gaya to meri bivi mujhe khacha chaba jayegi..

chor-agar mai khali pahucha to kya meri bivi mujhe taal k khayegi….??

:: Best Husband and Wife Jokes ::

admi shadi kyu krta hai?
marne k baad woh swarg mai jaye to acha feel kare ,aur nark mai jaye to apne ghar jaisa feel kare….

ek admi ki nye nye shadi hue,phir bhi sham mai use ghr jane ki koi jaldi nahi rehti,woh der tak office mai hi rehta tha

boss ne pucha kya baat hai

ushne ne bataya ki meri bivi bhi job krti hai,aur jo ghar jaldi jata hai khana bhi usi ko banana padeta hai

:: Best Husband and Wife Jokes ::

3 sharabi apas mai baat kr rahe the ki kaun apni bivi kitna control mai rakhta hai..
unme se 3 chup tha?
2no ne puch kya hua?
3 bola kaal hi meri bivi ghutno k baal mere pass aye..
2no ne kaha shabas!!!
3- aur mujhe boli agar mard ho to bed k niche se niklo….

:: Best Husband and Wife Jokes ::

patni 1/2 hr se phone pekisi se baat kr rahi thi,ushne call cut kr diya..
pati-aaj tmne bahut jaldi call cut kr diya..

patni-wrong no tha ishliye

patni-apne pati ki kabr pe pankha kr rahi thi..
ek admi ne bola-behan ji ab ishpe pankha kr k kya fayda
patni-hmare yaha ek rule hai jab tak pati ki kabr sukh nhi jati,tab tak patni ki dusari shadi nhi ho sakti…

ek admi apni patni ka antimsanshkar kr k ghar aa raha tha
tahi jor se bijli kadki,badal garje or jor se barish hue

dukhi admi ne apne sath chal rhe logo se kaha– lagta hai pahuch gaye..

ek admi ko cncer hua tha
ek din ushk beta ne pucha-papa apko cancer hai phir bhi ap logo se keh rahe hai ki apko Aids hai..
pita ne jwab diya-taki mere marne k baad koi tmhari mummy ko chune ki himmat na kare…

:: Husband and Wife Jokes ::

ek kuwe ki manyata thi ki sikka dal kr mano kamna puri ho jati thi..
ek pati patni waha gaye
pati ne sikka dala aur kuwe k pass se haat gaya..
patni gaye aur woh kuwe pass juki sikka dalne k liye aur gir gaye ..
pati thodi der sant tha aur bhi bola– itni jaldi ye to chamatkar hai…..

 

Aside

Facebook पे ब्लॉक Insult of Girl Funny

लड़की फेसबुक पर अनजान लड़के से चैटिंग कर रही थी,
लड़की – डार्लिंग आप मुझसे प्यार करते हो ना?
लड़का – नहीं बिलकुल नहीं ,
लड़की – क्यों?
लड़का – फेसबुक पे हर लड़की 1000 के नोट की तरह होती है,
लड़की – मतलब ?
लड़का – फेसबुक पे लड़की 1000 के नोट जैसी होती है मतलब ,
पता नही कब फर्जी निकल आये :)
लड़का blocked :) :)

Aside

Funny Facebook Chat Joke

लड़का लड़की फेसबुक पे चैट कर रहे थे ,
लड़का – Call me darling ,,
लड़की – Darling ,,
लड़का – Call me honey ,,
लड़की – Honey ,,
लड़का – अबे दिमाग ख़राब मत कर बैलेंस ख़त्म हो गया है ,
इसीलिए बोल रहा हूँ Call me ,,
लड़की – ok ok

Aside

Girl Father Shadi new hindi jokes

एक दातों के डॉक्टर की बेटी को एक लड़के से प्यार हो गया ,

वो रोज लड़के को अपने पापा के पास शादी की बात करने भेजती थी ,

लेकिन लड़का कुछ बात नहीं कर पाता था ,

लड़की – क्या तुमने आज पापा से बात की ?

लड़का – नहीं ,

लड़की(गुस्से में) – क्यों ?

लड़का(रोता हुआ)- हिम्मत नहीं पड़ी ,
आज फिर चुपचाप एक दाँत और निकलवा कर आ गया

Funny Boyfriend Girlfriend ka Pyaar bhara joke

GF: बेबी?

BF: या डिअर

GF: तुम हमेशा से मेरे साथ थे, जब मेरा वो भयानक एक्सीडेंट हुआ तब भी,
जब मेरे पाचवे सेमेस्टर में 3 सब्जेक्ट में जीरो आए थे तब भी,
जब मुझे किडनी में पथरी हुई थी तब भी, और
जब मुझे पापा ने गुस्से में घर से निकाल दिया था तब भी..

BF: Aaawww love you baby और में हमेशा तुम्हारे साथ रहूँगा

GF: अरे नई रे मेरे को लग रहा है की शायद तू ही पनोती है! 😀

Suraj ki pehli kiran ….new hindi jokes

Suraj ki pehli kirAn Khushi de apko,
Dusri kironnn hasi de apko,
TIsri kironn tandurasti,
Aur Chouthi kamyabi de,
Bas ab kafi ho gaya..
Agar jyada to Fir garmi lagegi?!!

..Good Morning…

* Uth Jao Aalsio or
desh ka kuch bhala karo,
Are re… Accha Aap ho…
Sorry,
Rehne do Aap to wapis so hi jao,
usi me desh ka bhala hai..

“Good Morning”

 

  • Pappu: meri koi gf nahi ban rahi hai?
    Jyotishi: kaise bangi bhai? “kundli mein sukh hi sukh likha hai, mauj kar”.

    *1 ladki phaansi laga rahi thi.
    Pappu ne khirki se dekha.
    socho Pappu ne ladaki ko kya bola hoga?

    sirf latakane se lambai nahin badhegi Mummy ko bolo Complan pilae……..

    * Ajab chiragh hu..
    din raat jal raha hu ..
    Main thak gaya hu..
    hawa se.. kaho bhuja de mujhe!
    GOOD NIGHT

  • Aye chand utaro zara inko ek hath maro,
    Bister se inko niche utaro,
    Karo in ke sath ab tum fight,
    Kyu ke ye so rahe the bina kahe.. GOOD NIGHT 😀

Dil kholo aur Pyar lo, new hindi jokes

Dil kholo aur Pyar lo,
Dimagg kholo aur Gyaan lo,
Aankhein kholo khwab le lo,
Honth kholo aur Muskan le lo,
Kapre kholo
Aur
NAHA lo,
Soch badlo,
Desh badal jayega.
* Naa kisi ke “ABHAAV” me jiyo,
Naa kisi Ke “PRABHAAV” me jiyo,
Zindgi aapki hai,
Bas apne Mast “SWABHAAV” me jiyoo..!
Good Morning…

  • 1 Ladke Bus Stop par khari ek laraki se bola, “I love you”.
    Larke ki baat sunate hi larki ne use ek thappar rasid kar diya aur boli, “ab bol kya bola?”
    Ladke: Ohoo…jab tune suna nahin to chata kyon mara?

    *Ladka: I Love You.
    Ladki: I love you, too.
    Ladka: ek kiss de do.
    Ladki: nahin, ye sab shaadi ke baad.
    Ladka: theek hai, phir shaadi hote hi mujhe phone karna.

    * Es kadar hum unki mohabbat mein kho gaye,
    Ki ek nazar dekha aur bas unhi ke ho gaye,
    Ankh khuli to andhera tha, dekha ek sapna tha,
    Aankh band ki aur unhi sapno me phir kho gaye…

 

  • Khayalo me unka aana jab se aam ho gya,                        Din kaise gujrata hai..
    raat ke intezar me humse na pucho. GN

Raat ke bad subah ko aana hi hai, new hindi funny jokes

In Taji hawa me phulo ki mehak ho,
Pehli kiran me chidiyon ki chehak ho,
Jab bhi kholo Aap apni palkein,
Un palkon me bas khushiyon ki hi jhalak ho..
GooD MorninG…

  • Raat ke bad subah ko aana hi hai,
    gum ke bad khusi ko aana hi hai.
    kya hua agar hum der tak sote rahe,
    par hamara morning SMS to aana hi hai..
  • dhire dhire apna bana gaya hai koi
    pyar ke suhane sapne dikha gaya hai koi
    ya khuda ye pyar hi hai
    ya phir se CHUNA laga gaya hai koi.

    *Girl ne haste hue jokes bhare andaz me bola: kal main tumhare lie raakhi lekar aai thi, tumane bandhwai kyon nahin?
    Pappu: agar kal main tumhaare lie mangalsutr lekar aaoon to pahan legee kya?
    Girl-shocked!!

funny jokes

Neend bhari ankho ko jara dhire dhire kholo,
Is pyari si subah ki nami se apni palko ko jara dho lo,
Humne to Aapko bol diya hai Good Morning,

Ab apki baari hai Humain Good Morning to bolo.

* Aaj Subah ka Suraj Bilkul Aap Jaisa Nikla hai,
Wahi Khubsurti,
Wahi Noor,
Wahi Guroor,
Wahi Suroor,
Aur Wahi Apki Tarah Hamse Bahut Door.
Good Morning.

 

  • Love letter:- Jab dil laga hamein khali-2,ladki patani chahi samne bali. Vah hamein dekhakar hans gayi,humne socha ladki pat gayi. Us se milne ka tarika laga behtar,turant likh diya love letter! Ek din uske papa ne mujhe bulaya,bare prem se ek chata lagaya! Bole tin bar B.A mai fail hokar,banana chahte ho filmi actor! Kharab karna chahte ho ladki ka charecter! Us din se hum khoye-2 se rahne lage,dil ke arman anshuo mai bahne lage! Ek din ladki humare pas aayi,boli ye khat padkar sunana! Maine kaha tumhe hindi padna nhi aati,ladki boli,agar hindi padna aati,to tumhare letter ko papa ke pas kyon le jati?

    * Na Jane Kab Koi Taara Toot Jaye,
    Na Jaane Kab Koi Aansu Aankh Se Chut Jaaye,
    Kuch Pal Hamare Saath Bhi Has Lo,
    Na Jaane Kab Tumhare Daant Toot Jaaye..!!

  • A bed of clouds 4u to sleep,
    Diamond stars as ur bed side lamp,
    Angels from heaven singing lullabies 4u,
    May u sleep peacefully, Good Ni8..
  • Tu chand aur main sitara hota,
    Aasmaan mein ek aashiyana humara hota,
    Log tumhe door se dekhte,
    Nazdik se dekhne ka hak bas humara hota.