very quite jokes

अध्यापक – बच्चों तुममें से स्वर्ग कौन जाएगा ?

सबने हाथ खड़ा कर दिया…

केवल एक छोटी लड़की ने नहीं किया |


अध्यापक तुम क्यो नहीं जाना चाहती ?


लड़की – मां ने कहा है..
कि पाठशाला से सीधा घर नहीं आई..
तो टांगे तोड़ दूंगी..

 


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Funny jokees for teacher student jokes

  • During An English Lesson, The Teacher Notices That A Boy Was Not Paying Attention To Him.
    Teacher : Pappu, Join These Two Sentences Together. I Was Cycling To School. I Saw A Dead Body.
    Pappu : (Thinking For A While) I Saw A Dead Body Cycling To School.

 

  • Teacher: what is your father name?
    Student: His name is BUTTER RED
    Teacher: what?
    Student: yes madam, his name is MAKHAN LAL!!!!!
  • Teacher: Who was Raja Ram Mohan Roy?
    Student: They all four were great friends

 

  • Teacher:”What is your name?”

Student:”Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai.”
Teacher:”When I ask question in English, answer it in English.”
Student:”My name is Sunlight.

  • Teacher: how were the exams?
    Student: the questions were easy but the answers were hard.

 

 

Teacher: RAGHU, HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT THE EARTH IS ROUND?RAGHU: I NEVER SAID IT IS ROUND.

 
Teacher: Ritu spell “Blind Bird”
RITU: B,l,n,d B,r,d
Teacher: Where are the two i’s??
RITU: Teacher a blind bird doesn’t have eyes!
Teacher: ?????????

 

Once a teacher said to the children: When I will ask you a question, give the answer very fast.
Teacher: What is the capital of India?
Child: Very fast
Teacher: WHAT HAPPEN TO GOLD IF EXPOSED IN AIR?
RAMESH: IT IS STOLEN, SIR

Rahul: Madam my paper is the neatest.
Teacher: You haven’t written anything.
Rahul: That’s why it is the neatest.

Teacher: Rita, please stand up and answer this question. Why did the calf cross the road?
Rita: I don’t know madam. But I know someone who can answer this question.
Teacher: (astonished) who?
Rita: Very simple the calf

 

:Boy :- My Father Name Is Laughing And My Mother’s Name Is Smiling.
Teacher :- You Must Be Kidding?
Boy :- No, That’s My Brother.i Am Joking..!

 

Beautyfull pictures for taecher day

 

Happy picture

New hindi funny jokes

Funny Jokes

भैया आज कल तो 7वीं क्लास के बच्चों की भी Girlfriend होती है…

और एक हम थे

जो इस उम्र में

पुराने टायर घुमाते फिरते थे…

mekeup jokes

Baith kar mehbuba ki Baho me Aisa JosH Aaya…
Wah!
Wah!!
Baith kar mehbuba ki Baho me Aisa JosH Aaya…
Phirrrrr…?
Phir kya.! Biwi Ne Dekh Liya aur ICU Me Hosh Aaya………………………funniest hindi jokes

Im a great fan of Thomas Edison, Because of his quote that..
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Tomorrow is my exam but I dont care..
Because a single sheet of paper cannot decide my future…………………..funniest hindi jokes in english

WhatsApp killed sms/msgs!
YouTube killed DVD!
Skype killed ISD calls!
Amazon killed real life shopping and Facebook killed LIFE……………………funniest hindi jokes in english

Intention” kitna bhi achchha ho…,duniya “presentation” dekhti hai.

Aur..

“Presentation” kitna bhi achchha ho, uparwala “intention” dekhta hai.

All my life I thought air was free
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until I bought a packet of ‘Lays’

Different types of Girlfriend fighting with their boyfriend..
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Pilot’s Girlfriend : Zyada ud Matt Samjha
Teacher’s Girlfriend : Mujhe mat Sikhao Samjhe
Dentist’s Girlfriend : Daant tod ke hath me de dungi
C.A.’S Girlfriend : Hisaab se reh samjha…
Engineer’s Girlfriend :
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Abey pehle Pass toh ho ja fir baat karna……………girlfriend boyfriend jokes

Most Deadly Combination Ever !
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Internet Explorer + BSNL Internet + IRCTC + female user

Santa ko chand par bhejne ka faisla hua..
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Aadhe raste jakar Santa rocket se kood gaya or chillaya……
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kamino aaj to amawasya hai, chand to hoga hi nahi….

Tragedies with boys’ life:


01. Good girls r not good looking
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02. Good looking girls r not good girls
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03. Good looking & good girls r not single
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04. Good looking, good & single girls have strong brothers
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05. Good looking, good, single girls without brothers will treat boys as her brother………………..funniest hindi jokes for facebook

Dr:Kaise aana hua?
Santa: Doctorsaab tabiyat theek nahi hain
Dr: Sharab peete ho?
Santa: Peeta to hoon, par chhota peg hi banana. I’m not feeling well !

A boy went to a Baba:” Baba meri GF 12 Ghante se Khamosh hai..
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Baba with an awesome reply
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Mere pass Kyun aaye ho, LIMCA book of Records k paas jaao beta.

Me : bhaiya samose ache nahi bane aaj,, Kal wale ache the.
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Shop owner – kya baat kar rahe ho bhaiya,,, ye Kal wale hi toh hai.

Behind every successful person, there is a
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DEACTIVATED FACEBOOK ACCOUNT..

Sabse jyada gussa kab aata hai..???
Jab aapka teacher bole ki maikal class test lunga aur next day jab wo test lena bhool jaye,.
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Aur class ka koi baccha bol de..
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Sir ! Aaj test nahi loge kya..???

I used to like my neighbors
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until they set a password for their Wi-Fi

Ek Ladki apne BF k sath Ghoom Rahi thi.. .
Itne me us ka husband aa gaya aur uske BF Ko pitne laga…….
Ladki- Maar saale Ko Apni biwi ghumaata nahi h, Aur dusro
ki biwi gumaane le aata hai…
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(itne me BF josh me husband ko marne laga)
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Ladki – Maar saale Ko, na khud ghumaane le jata hai, na kisi aur ko ghumaane deta hai……………….funniest hindi jokes ever

Bohat purani kahawat hai
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Is liye mujhe yaad nahi Kal Soch kE BaTaUnGa

Maine darwaza khola to uski ankho me ansu, chehre par hansi thi,
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Sason me aahen, dil me bebasi thi,
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Pagli ne pehle nahi bataya ki
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Darwaze me uski ungli fasi thi

Dear Weather,
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Don’t Be Soo Romantic I Am Still Single

collage very funny jokes

Midnight coffee,
Long chat,
Birthday bumps,
Bunking classes,
Crush on pal,
Fight marks,
Tears 4 love,
Just every thing,
People call it college.
We call it life…

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

College is 4 Knowledge,
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Knowledge is 4 Life,
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Life is 4 Wife,
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but
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Wife is a knife which cuts ur Life,
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So never choose ur Wife in a College Life better

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

*School vs College*
*School= Pencil,Rubber,
Sharpner,Scale
*College= Ek Balpen Wo
Bhi Friend Sy Cheena Hua

*School= Class Mein Enter
Hony Sy Pehly Maam May I
Come…
*College= Bina Btae He
Mobile Kan Sy Laga K
Class Sy Bahir
*School= Bag Mein Her
Subject Ki Book & Copy..
*College= Yar Aik Paper
To Phar k Dae
*School= Class Test Mein
Star..
*College= Full Moon Hi
Naseeb Hota Hai Yar..
*School= Dost Mujhe Wo
Wali Class Felow Achi
Lagti Hai, 2nd Ok..
*College= Jigr Bachi
Check Kr, 2sra Oye Sharam
Kr Bhabi Hai Teri.
Wonderful School Days &
Lovely College Life..!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The Best “Oopss!” Moment of COLLEGE Life…

When The Teacher is Looking for someone to Answer the Question & you Accidentally make an Eye-Contact!!
Isn’t it….

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Dedicated to all friends:
so many subjects in 1 little year,
so many hands in 1 tiffin box,
so many calls on 1 birthday nights,
so many tears for 1 single fight,
so many memories in 1 single heart,
that’s ……..
A whole lifetime in just 3 years

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Lines by College boy…

Love is when i walk to other side of classroom
to sharp my pencil, Just to See her..

N then realize that,
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Im holding a pen..!!

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A good lecture should be like a Girl’s mini skirt…

Long enough to cover the subject &
short enough to create interest.

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College Life
means…
8 frnds,2 bikes bt no petrol…!
… means…
Exam nite,6 dufers & no notes…!
means…
Sitting on sea view,6 smokerz & 1 cigarette…!
means…
Principal call for insult, 6 gangster nd all r saying first u go first u go
means…
1 Girl,6 frnds nd all r saying,Teri Bhabi,Teri Bhabi.!
means.!
Evrythng stupid but sumthng sensible.!
Like FRIENDSHIP.! ?

collage funny jokes

Truth of College Life
‘D First Benchers know the Answers to all d Problems.’
‘Only d Back Benchers hav d Power 2 Face Every Problem.’

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College life

ASSIGNMENT copy karte time

” Oye!! Ye kya likha hai ?? ”
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” Jo word samajh aa raha haiwo likh,
jo nai aaraha uska aisa hi design bana de’!!

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3 best jokes of college life :

1. Don’t disturb me, I want to study….
2. No class, lets go to library
and the biggest one……..
3. Sir, I have a doubt…

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Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE-
C-Come,
O-On,
L-Lets,
L-Love,
E-Each,
G-Girl,
E-Equally……
Thats why boys go to college regularly..

========================================

We came wit d
fear of not knowing anybody…

But

We ll go wit tears after knwing evrybody…

& dat’s called”COLLEGE LIFE”.

“COLLEGE LIFE ROCKS”

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Professor said
if any boy goes to girls hostel
rs:100 for first time
rs:200 for 2ndtime &
rs:500for third time

one boy asked”how much for monthly pass???”

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College days are a person’s finest days,
Lived in joy,
Spent in carefree ways,
Remembered with a heavy heart!

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Lots of smiles,
Smiles with no worries,
Gala time spent together,
Time spent with no limit,
Lifelong friendship,
This is called college friendship,

collage funny jokes

कॉलेज में..

लड़कीः इतनी गौर से क्यों देख रहे हो तुम्हारी कोई बहन नहीं है क्या?

ME: बहन है इसलिए ही तो देख रहा हूं

उसने कहा है भैय्या कॉलेज से भाभी लाना…

—————————————-

पप्पू : पिछले हफ्ते मेरी और मेरी गर्लफ्रेंड की लड़ाई

हो गयी , और फिर हम अलग हो गए
गोलू : फिर ?
पप्पू : उसने मुझे चिढ़ाने के लिए अपने नए बॉयफ्रेंड के
साथ फोटो खिंचवा कर मुझे भेज दी ..
गोलू : ओह , ये तो बहुत बुरा किया उसने !!
पप्पू : तो में भी कौनसा कम हूँ ,
उसकी वही फोटो उसके बाप को भेज दी … :-कमीनी बहुत पीटी ओर अपने कलेजे मे ठंडक आगई

 

 

 

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LECTURE ME MASTI THI ,

HAMARI BHI KUCH HASTI THI,
TEACHER KA SAHARA THA DIL YE AAWARA THA,
KAHAN AA GAYE IS DEGREE KI AAFAT MEIN YAAR WO SCHOOL HI KITNA PAYARA THA.

——————————————

Son:
Papa Ap Ko Yaad Hai
Ap Ne Kaha Tha Ki Agar Exam Me Paas Hua
To 5000 Rs. Inam Denge.

Papa:
Han Han Bilkul Yaad Hai

Son:
To Mubarak Ho
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.
Ap Ke 5000 Bach Gaye.

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Movies of College life
Classes- Bardasht.
Attendance- Hera pheri.
Class room- No entry.
Teacher- Janidushman.
Exam- Evil dead.
Examiner- Don.
Frnd during paper- Hum aapke hai kaun?
Viva- Encounter.
Marking- Andha kanoon.
Exam time- Qayamat.
Cheating- Lage raho munna bhai.
Question paper- Ek paheli.
Answer paper- Kora kagaj.
Result- Sadma.
pass- Chamatkar.
Fail- Devdas.
Future- Na tum jano na hum….!

——————————————-

If u ever start missing
Ur college days,
Ur class,
Ur friend circle,
Canteen
or
anything about college life..

Just open ur mark-sheets
Sara nasha utar jaega..

——————————————-

SCHOOL- One pair dress for 7 days
COLLEGE- 7 pair dress for one day
SCHOOL- 2 copy for one subject
COLLEGE- 1 copy for all subject
SCHOOL- A white pipe in teacher’s hand (chalk)
COLLEGE- A white pipe in students hand (cigarette)
SCHOOL- Most frequent letter, leave letter
COLLEGE- Most frequent letter, love letter
Have a sweet college life.

—————————————–

1 Hand on Pen,
Other Hand on Phone..
1 Ear on Lecture,
Other Ear on Friends Talk..
1 Eye on Board,
Other Eye on Figure..
So college life is not easy…

collage funny jokes

कभी गौर किया …..
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गर्ल कालेज़ के पास ऐसा कोई बोर्ड नही होता
जिसके ऊपर लिखा हो
“धीरे चलीऐ आगे कालेज़ है”
क्युंकि
सबको पता है यहां सब साले धीरे ही चलेंगे!

—————————————–
सरकार कहती है
1 लड़की ने पढ़ाई कर ली तो घर के 4
लोगों को शिक्षित बनाती है…
पर
लडकी के पढते समय कालेज़ के 40 लडके फेल हो जाते
हैं उसका क्या?
जनता जवाब मांग रही है।
—————————————-
 जैसे ही बजट में सिगरेट की कीमतें बढ़ी,

हॉस्टल में रहने वाले लड़कों ने घर फ़ोन लगाकर बता दिया कि
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कॉलेज की फीस बढ़ गयी है।

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एक समारोह में अध्यापक ने सभी छात्रों से पूछा,

इस कॉलेज में आपका कोई कड़वा अनुभव ?
एक छात्र बोला,
”मैं और मेरी वाइफ इसी कॉलेज में मिले थे।”

—————————————

कॉलेज में..

लड़कीः इतनी गौर से क्यों देख रहे हो तुम्हारी कोई बहन नहीं है क्या?

ME: बहन है इसलिए ही तो देख रहा हूं

उसने कहा है भैय्या कॉलेज से भाभी लाना…

——————————————-

नौकरी वो करो जो
तुम्हें पसंद हो….

हां अगर तुम इंजीनियर हो
तो जो मिल जाये वही सही है…

——————————-

कुछ लोगो की ज़िन्दगी में बस दो ही मक़सद
होते हैं…
पहला बी.टेक करना….
.
.
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दूसरा उसके बाद अपने पहचान में किसी को
भी बी.टेक करने से रोकना…

——————————————

School/College Life Ki Movies :

Classes- Bardasht.
Attendance- Hera pheri.
Class room- No entry.
Teacher- Janidushman.
Exam- Evil dead.
Examiner- Don.
Frnd during paper- Hum aapke hai kaun?
Viva- Encounter.
Marking- Andha kanoon.
Exam time- Qayamat.
Cheating- Lage raho munna bhai.
Question paper- Ek paheli.
Answer paper- Kora kagaj.
Result- Sadma.
pass- Chamatkar.
Fail- Devdas.
Future- Na tum jano na hum.